Conquering Fear

What really keeps you from living your dreams?

What problem is most dominant in peoples lives?

The answer is: FEAR!

People live every day in fear. Fear of losing their wealth, fear of losing their loved ones, fear of making the wrong decisions, fear of being themselves, fear of growing up, fear of making a commitment. The list goes on and on.

The leading cause of people not fulfilling their dreams is NOT the fear of failure – itís the fear of success! The fear of actually accomplishing what they set out to do. The fear of living life to the fullest may have paralyzed you. This will cause you to never really try in your business, or if you do try, to sabotage your efforts so you never have to face your fear of success.

Most people live their lives in the grip of this fear and they arenít even aware that it has control over them! The fear is the one thing that can turn your dreams of financial freedom, loving relationships, and a fulfilling and significant life into a pattern of habits including procrastination, self-sabotage and other bad habits.

Fear is the dominate problem in your life today. The two questions you need to answer to conquer your fear are:

Which fear has the most control over your behavior? Is it the fear of failure, the fear of rejection, the fear of success, or is it all of them?

How do I interrupt the bad habits that I have developed as a means of protection from this fear? How do I interrupt the programming I have within me?

These are the two most significant questions when it comes to overcoming your fears. If you can answer these two questions, your life will forever change!

The reality of fear is that it is human and is a part of life. Itís not going to go away. Some fear is even healthy! It is a gift given to you to keep you safe and bring you closer to your creator.

Every person is born with three instinctive fears. These are: fear of falling, fear of loud noises, and fear of abandonment. These three fears were given to you to help you monitor what is going on around you. Think about it; it is fear that gives you the adrenaline rush that makes you escape from a situation that is really, truly unsafe. It also gives you the same rush that causes you to fight to win.

Faith is born in fear. God knew in His infinite wisdom that fear is what would drive His people back to Him. Although sometimes it is only in times of extreme fear that we look to God and choose Him. Take a look at your own life and think about the times you looked to God for His power and wisdom. Those were probably times of extreme fear. True faith is born from fear!

So what caused the gift of fear to be the number one problem in society today? Why do people let fear control their actions, beliefs and lives? The answer is the difference between reacting to fear and acting in fear. It has everything to do with your belief system.

Children typically react instinctively to fear, which is appropriate behavior at this age. Most adults don’t make the distinction between reacting to fear, as when they were a child, and acting with their intellect when dealing with fear.

People react instinctively to fear by either denying it or running away from it. They miss the power that comes from acting with their intellect, never allowing the fear to become the gift it was intended to be. Learn to act with your intellect by exposing your true fears and the beliefs they represent and free yourself so you can move on with all you are meant to do, have and become!

 

Creative Imagination

Creative imagination is more than just active imagination. To be able to actively imagine things, to see and hear things in one’s mind, is an important ability. It doesn’t have to involve much creativity, though, does it? Daydreaming, for example, is a process of imagination. It can consist of an elaborate fantasy world, but one full of all the things that many people think about.

Creative imagination, then, has to include the ability not just to imagine things, but to imagine original things. It is seeing things that others don’t see, and coming up with new ideas. So how do you cultivate this?

Creative Imagination 101

First, exercise your basic imagination. It can be as simple as thinking in pictures more, or listening to music in your mind. Play little “movies” in your mind, until you can watch them on command. This is a simple process, but for those of us that can’t easily do it naturally, it can take a lot of practice. Fortunately, it is not an unpleasant activity.

The second part of developing your creative imagination is to get more creative in your thinking and imagining. Start by paying attention to your creativity. Our subconscious minds give us more of what we pay attention to. Ignore creative aspects of your life, and you’re telling your subconscious they are unimportant. On the other hand, if you note when you’re creative, your subconscious mind will start feeding you more creative ideas.

Different surroundings can also encourage your creativity. Want more creativity in your love life? Hike up a mountain with your partner. Do you write? Try sitting on a roof to write. Want new ideas for your business? Take a notebook to the park and sit by the duck pond. A change of environment can get your thinking out of it’s ruts.

You can play games that exercise your creative imagination. One such game uses a technique called “concept combination.” Alone or with other players, you combine random concepts or things in new ways, to see who has the best idea. A thermometer and a billboard, for example, could generate an idea for a sign that checks the weather and adjusts the message accordingly (“Come in out of the heat for a cold beverage,” or “Come in out of the rain and warm up with our gourmet coffee.”).

Don’t Wait For Creative Imagination

Creative inspiration certainly can strike at any time, but it strikes more often when there is work instead of waiting. So if you want to come up with creative inventions, start mentally redesigning everything you see. Imagine a better bicycle, a faster mail service, or a better chair. Continue this for three weeks, and it will become a habit.

Of course, creative imagination goes beyond solving specific problems or inventing things. Truly creative minds are always coming up with the questions too, not just the solutions. If you want to be more creative all the time, focus on three things:

1. Changing your perspective. A child might think that working just to not work (to retire) is silly. Thinking from that perspective might give you ideas for how to make money doing things you enjoy. Seeing the world as a bear sees it might give a painter imaginative new ideas. Looking at things from a customer’s perspective is a sure way to find creative improvements for a business. See everything from several perspectives.

2. Challenging your assumptions. What if restaurants didn’t have employees? Visitors pay a machine as they enter, feed themselves at a buffet, and everything is as automated as possible, so one owner-operator could run a large restaurant alone. Challenge all your assumptions for practice. Do you really have to pay rent? Do swimming pools need water? Can exercise be a bad thing?

3. Let your ideas run wild. Does a flying bed seem silly? It could lead to the concept of a helium mattress. When you get off it in the morning, it floats out of the way, up to the ceiling. Perfect for small apartments. Don’t stifle your creativity. Relax, and let ideas come. You can always discard them later.

For these techniques to be a habitual part of your thinking, use them regularly. Since it takes several weeks to develop a habit, remind yourself to use them each day. Jot a few of your favorite techniques on a card and carry it with you. Look it over throughout the day and apply the techniques to anything. Soon, you’ll have a more creative imagination.

Be A Leader Not A Follower

Most people in life are happy to follow the lead of other people, to sit on the fence in a debate or have the attitude of hiding at the back of the class. The most successful people are leaders and make things happen for themselves by taking a positive attitude and through working very hard to reach their goals. We are all able to become leaders and this article may help you to achieve this status.

I grew up as a very nervous person, who had very little self-confidence and who was very shy. I was not happy being this way and often felt jealous of other people who were happy to speak up and take control of tasks and situations. I wanted to be one of these leaders and not the follower that I certainly had become.

In my early twenties, I decided that the time had arrived to make a series of life changing decisions. I was determined to have a happy and successful life and was aware that I needed to change my whole attitude and approach to life.

I was not happy at where I worked and joined an employment agency in an attempt to find alternative employment. In the reception area of the agency, I started speaking to a man who was also their hoping to find a different job. His name was Mark and we got on well and wished each other the best of luck in our quest to find work. We even exchanged phone numbers and vowed to keep each other up to date with our progress.

I was then interviewed by a man who explained his plan to help me to find this new role of work. He was very bright, clever and positive and had many interesting ideas. He seemed very confident that I would soon be employed for a different company more suited to the skills which I had.

At one stage of the meeting he described the scenario of a group interview. He suggested that we may be ushered into a large room with a big table. As we sat down there would be a sheet of paper asking the group to debate a particular subject. He stated that all of the people in the room would be in the same position, all looking for work, all nervous, however that in that room I could be whoever I wanted to be. He said that I needed to stand up and take the lead by stating that I would act as chairman and that if anyone had a comment that they wanted to make, that they could raise their hand. If I did this I would show my prospective employer that I was a leader.

I went home and thought about this and did not believe I had it in me to act in the way that he wanted me to, as I was not a leader. Later that evening Mark phoned and all he was talking about was the group interview scenario. He also stated that there was no way that he would be able to stand up either in the way that had been described.

I did not have to ever attend a group interview, but Mark did. He surprised himself by carrying out the advice and stated that after he had said his initial statement about being the chairman, that he had never felt so powerful and in control. For the rest of the day other members of the group had been regularly asking him questions as if he was some sort of team leader. He was very proud of himself and I am happy to report that he was successful at that interview and is very happy in his new position.

He has also taken the success and learning experience into his social life and states that he has never had a higher self-esteem. I am very pleased for him as he is a genuine person who works very hard. He is also one of only a few friends that I can honestly say that I trust.

I have taken inspiration from Mark and have entered into a career of helping people who stutter, to achieve fluency. This is something which I really enjoy and which gives me a large amount of job satisfaction. I am also far more confident than I ever have been and have at last found happiness.

In conclusion we all have it in us to be a leader. We need to be brave and determined to take control and remember that all we can do in life is to try our best. We are only sure about living one life, so lets be happy and not accept second best. Be a leader in life, not a follower.

 

20 Ways To Make Someone Smile

Do you want to put a smile on someone’s face today? Maybe make their day a little better. It won’t cost you a single penny or much time to do just that. And because smiling is contagious, it probably won’t just be one person you make smile today.

Here are 20 ways to turn that frown upside down.

1. Send some flowers to your partner at work.
2. Compliment a friend or work colleague on their appearance.
3. Donate something to charity.
4. Take a friend out to lunch.
5. Let someone know you miss them.
6. Make a surprise telephone call to your partner at work, just to say hi.
7. Hold a door open for someone walking behind you.
8. Hug your partner for no reason.
9. Leave a joke on a friends answer machine.
10. Send a card to a friend letting them know what a good friend they are.
11. Give up your seat on the train to someone when there aren’t any left.
12. Share your umbrella on a rainy day.
13. Ask a friend if they need anything while you’re out shopping.
14. When it’s raining, plan an indoor picnic with your children.
15. Leave a love letter somewhere where your partner will find it.
16. Send someone an unusual and unexpected gift like chocolate, flowers or sex toys.
17. Tell your child you’re proud of them.
18. Tell someone you thought about them the other day.
19. Cook a surprise meal for your partner one night, especially if they normally do the cooking.
20. Tell your partner you love them.

Did you know it takes only 17 muscles to smile, but 43 to frown. Why waste all that energy frowning when you could just smile.

Here are 5 more facts about smiling.

1. Women smile more than men.
2. Smiling releases endorphins that make us feel better.
3. We are all born with the ability to smile, it’s not something we learn from others.
4. A smile is a universal expression of happiness.
5. A smiling person is thought to be a more pleasant, attractive, sociable, sincere and competent than a non-smiling person.

Just remember, smiling is the easiest and cheapest way of improving your looks.

 

How to Sell to Anyone

Let’s face it. We all have those difficult customers to whom we are required to sell. From the demanding, abrasive buyer to the individual who never seems to make a buying decision, we encounter challenging people on a regular basis. Part of the reason this happens is due to the disconnect we have because of conflicting personalities. This post will look at the four key types of people and how to improve your results with each.

Direct Donna. Donna is very direct in her approach. She tends to be forceful and always wants to dominate or control the sales call. Her behaviour is aggressive, she points at you while she talks, interrupts your to challenge you, and she seldom cares about hearing the details of your new product or service. Instead, she demands that you cut to chase and tell me the bottom line. Donna is very results-focused and goal-oriented and hates wasting time.

To achieve the best sales results with this individual you need to be more direct and assertive. Tell her at the beginning of the sales call or meeting that you know how busy she is and how valuable her time is. Tell her that you will get right to the point and focus your conversation on the results she will achieve by using you product or service. Resist the temptation to back down if she confronts you because you will lose her respect. To Donna, it is not personal, it’s just business.

Lastly, be direct in asking for her business, you don’t have to dance around this issue.

Talkative Tim. Tim is a gregarious and outgoing person but very ego-centric. He is often late for your meetings and his constant interruptions and long stories cause your sales calls to go beyond the scheduled time. He appears to be more concerned with listening to himself talk which is frustrating because you don’t always get enough time to discuss your solution.

Relationships are very important to Talkative Tim so invest more time in social conversation. Even if you don’t see the point in this, he will appreciate the gesture and will like you more. This person often makes buying decisions on intuition and how he feels about the sales person.

Be careful not to challenge Tim because he will feel rejected and when this happens he will shut down and become unresponsive. During your sales presentation, tell him how good your solution will make him look to others in the company or how his status or image will improve. In other words, appeal to his ego.

Steady Eddie. Soft-spoken, Eddie is a nice fellow who seems more focused on his team and coworkers than on his personal results. He is very quiet compared to some of your other prospects and can be difficult to read. But most frustrating is his reluctance to make a buying decision. Eddie’s mantra seems to be I’m still thinking about but thanks for following up.

Structure and security is important to these people and it is difficult for Eddie to make changes. He often contemplates how the decision will affect other people within the organization. That means you need to slow down the sales process, demonstrate how your solution will benefit the team, and remove as much risk from the decision-making process as possible. Soften your voice and make sure your sales presentation flows in a logical manner. Use words like fair logical and your team in your presentation.

Analytical Alice. She reads every point and specification about your product or service and regardless of how much information you give Alice, she always wants more, including written guarantees and back up documentation. She is very difficult to read and it is extremely difficult to get her engaged in an open conversation because personal feelings and emotions do not enter the picture when Alice makes a decision.

Whenever possible, give Alice a written, bullet-point agenda of your meeting beforehand. Ideally, email it to her a few days in advance so she can prepare herself. Make sure it is completely free of typos, spelling mistakes and punctuation errors. When you meet, follow the agenda in perfect order and if you make any type of claim, have supporting documentation available for her to read.

While the approach to use with each of these people may not make sense to you or seem completely rational, it is critical to recognize that how you naturally and instinctively sell may not be the best way to get results with someone else. Modifying your approach and style, even briefly, will help you better connect with your customers and prospects which means you will generate better sales.

Working OAuth2 with Foursquare on Sinatra

require 'rubygems'
require 'sinatra'
require 'oauth2'
require 'json'
require 'net/https'
require 'foursquare2'

set :port, 80

CLIENT_ID = '****************************************************'
CLIENT_SECRET = '****************************************************'
CALLBACK_PATH = '/callbacks/foursquare'

def client
OAuth2::Client.new(CLIENT_ID, CLIENT_SECRET,
{:site => 'https://foursquare.com/',
:token_url => "/oauth2/access_token",
:authorize_url => "/oauth2/authenticate?response_type=code",
:parse_json => true,
:ssl => {:ca_path => '/etc/ssl/certs' }
})
end

def redirect_uri()
uri = URI.parse(request.url)
uri.path = CALLBACK_PATH
uri.query = nil
uri.to_s
end

get CALLBACK_PATH do
puts redirect_uri
if params[:code] != nil
token = client.auth_code.get_token(params[:code], :redirect_uri => redirect_uri).token
client = Foursquare2::Client.new(:oauth_token => token)
email = client.user('self')['contact'].email.to_s
return "Authenticated user: #{email}"
else
'Missing response from foursquare'
end
end

get '/' do
redirect client.auth_code.authorize_url(:redirect_uri => redirect_uri)
end

Latest eclipse app on Mac OS Lion preference pane

When upgrading to a new eclipse app and selecting existing workspace it makes preference pane unavailable. So to be able to access settings you have to either create a new workspace and migrate projects to a new workspace or remove settings files from old one. This saved my time a couple of times.

Mac OS Lion and installing ruby 1.9.2

I am always having trouble with installing fresh rvm instance, so here are all steps needed in fresh rvm to install new ruby 1.9.2

export ARCHFLAGS="-arch x86_64"
export CC=gcc-4.2
rvm pkg install readline
rvm pkg install iconv
rvm pkg install zlib
rvm install 1.9.2 -C --with-readline-dir=$rvm_path/usr --with-iconv-dir=$rvm_path/usr --with-zlib-dir=$rvm_path/usr